Are you really alone?

Alone: having no one else present; on one’s own. 

As I sit here alone watching the moon dance with the haze of clouds in the night sky I find myself thinking about the words on this page and where I am at now compared to where I was just a few weeks ago when I started writing this. Now, I have found and discovered a sense of contentment in being alone. Not that I am completely alone, but I have realized that in my aloneness I can discover God more fully. By discovering God more fully I realize that I was never as alone as I thought I was because He was right there with me all along and never left me. The next three paragraphs are what I wrote a few weeks ago. Read and see my disparity in being and feeling so alone. 

As a single person it can be very difficult to shake the feeling of being alone. In this world the single, young adult population works at least one full-time job, often more than one job. We often live in apartments or a room in a house with people we barely know (and maybe don't like), if you live with people that you consider to be your friends, you are one of the lucky few. For me, church is a very important part of my week as it allows me a chance to get fellowship with my friends and if only for the space of a few hours a couple times a week, not feel alone. Very few people are fortunate enough to have their church and friends to be right next door, or even within walking distance. Our modern, technology-focused culture says that social media and social networks are the new norm. We try to forget that God created us to be in community with other people and replace it with online hangouts.  

I am continually finding that the online forms of ‘being social’ and ‘hanging out’ do not satisfy my needs for interacting with people. Granted, working a customer service type of job I get a lot of interaction with people on a daily basis, but that is a superficial façade. My job is a world where people ask how you are doing but could care less about the answer most of the time. At the end of the day I find myself going home exhausted from play acting to be someone I'm not all day and then have little to no desire to actually invest in any of my real friends. Online socializing and texting is also a mediocre substitute that we have used for the real deal.  

It can be hard to accept the fact that you are not truly alone when you feel so very alone. I know that I am not alone... I do have several friends and my family. I know that my family will be there for me no matter what. But my friends can be fair weather friends, that they will be there for me when it suits them. It's very hard to reach out and feel so unimportant at times, my reaching out is responded to with silence, and it feels like rejection. A rejection that hurts... at this very moment, I am alone, on my own and having no one else present. Sometimes being alone can be good, other times it is quite dangerous.

If your aloneness can lead you to a place where you realize your need for God, that, is an amazing thing! Then, you can find sweet communion with Him in your quiet times and will be well equipped to fight the toughest of battles that life brings your way. I cannot pretend to have everything perfect or even begin to tell you how to find any measure of contentment, besides telling you to ask God for it, but I can tell you to keep seeking Him in everything. Make time for God above your friends, put His needs above your own, and you will experience true and real joy. I hope that my vulnerability touches at least one person and challenges you to seek your Lord.